I am overwhelmed with how absolutely wonderful everyone is! When I feel all alone, it seems that God puts in on people's hearts to really be praying for me. What a blessing!
After my last blog post, I had several people reach out to me and tell me that they were praying. Thank you! Thank you! Thank you! Your prayers are powerful!
I do so appreciate every gift that is given me, whether it be a prayer, an email, phone call, or other communication, some diapers, some coupons, or just a quick thought wondering how I'm doing. Honestly, things are going alright, but I am on the emotional rollercoaster of a lifetime.
There are days and times that I feel on top of the world, mostly because I know that I'm not forgotten. There are other days when I would give almost anything to be able to go back in time and change my husband. Although, that's a ridiculous thought. I left because I couldn't change him, and he wasn't changing himself. So, going back to try to do what was already attempted would be futile. Still, I find myself wishing things could have been different. He tells me that he is now working on changing. Unfortunately, I've heard that all before, but I cannot tell you the way he pulls on my heart strings. After everything, I still love him. I wish we could stay together, but the safety of myself and my daughter are just too important. I leave out of necessity.
My biggest prayer at this point is that it will be an uncontested divorce. I really don't want to battle things out in court. He says he thinks we can agree on everything, but I'm not so sure. Please pray that this won't be more heartbreaking than it already has been.
As these and so many other thoughts barge in and interrupt my day, my day is also interrupted by friendly reminders that I am not forgotten. I am not going through this on an island in the middle of no where. I am not alone. That really helps to battle the blues.
I need to conclude with saying a big thank you one last time.